


The Dangers of Computers

by ionia



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, DCU (Animated), Superman - All Media Types
Genre: Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-25
Updated: 2013-09-25
Packaged: 2017-12-27 15:23:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/980517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ionia/pseuds/ionia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Horny Kryptonians don't pay attention to their surroundings. Instead, they accidentally call the Watchtower.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Dangers of Computers

**Author's Note:**

> Just a short little story.

“Hey honey, how are you?” Clark called out to Bruce as he walked down the stairs to the cave. Bruce, still in full Batman mode, was updating a file on his computer. When he’d reached the big chair, he placed a hand on Bruce’s shoulder, rubbing it slowly. It was a little tense.

Bruce stood, slid his cowl back. His hair was damp, little droplets of sweat trailing down his bangs. He’d just gotten back from patrol and was most probably unwanting of a distraction like Clark.

Clearly he hadn’t been thinking right, because that was the moment Bruce decided to kiss him, long and passionately. Clark turned them around, so Bruce was standing with his back to the console, the lights still blinking behind him. Bruce undid his shirt buttons while he unclasped the cape of Batman’s suit, the technique no secret to him anymore after eight months of dating. Or whatever the hell it was they were doing. The rest of the league sure didn’t know.

He tossed the cape aside, Bruce’s well formed body now better visible, only still hidden by the kevlar. Bruce placed himself on the edge of the console, trailing his fingers over Clark’s side and tugging at one of his belt loops to get him closer. Clark stood between Bruce’s legs. He kissed Bruce, using his nose to push him back slightly, while placing his hands on either side of Bruce on the console for support. The fact that his right hand now rested on the button used for calling the watchtower, went by unnoticed…

 

\---

 

Wally was on monitor duty. Nothing happened as usual and he was bored as fuck. Unable to sit still, he spun around in his chair while eating a doughnut.

The batsymbol started blinking on the big screen. Diana walked up to him, cup of coffee in her hand.

“A message from Batman,” she noted. J’onn came in through the floor the moment Wally hit _Acknowledge call_. The batsymbol ceased blinking and was now on the screen permanently.

 

“Hmm… baby…”

“Hrmph. You’re the only one that gets to call me baby. Or honey.”

“I know. And I’m very proud of that.”

“Good.”

Diana stared in shock. Was that Bruce’s voice? And… and Kal’s? Wally choked on his doughnut and quickly put his hand for his mouth to muffle his laughing.

“ _Oh my god_ ,” Diana whispered. On the other end of the line there were sounds of kissing. Or was that licking? Something was being whispered, she couldn’t hear what.

“No, you’re not carrying me upstairs. Just fuck me here already.”

J’onn cleared his throat. He looked uncomfortable. “Shouldn’t we inform them of our… presence?”

 

\---

 

Down in the cave, Bruce now only in the top half of his shirt, Clark’s pants dropped to his ankles, Superman pushed Batman’s upper body slowly down onto the console of the batcomputer. Bruce looked up at him, illuminated by the purple, blue and green lights of the keys. Other than that, total darkness surrounding them. It felt like they were in space. Clark looked back at him, reveling in the feeling of having Bruce so detached from his work and the world.

There was a moment of perfect silence. Then:

“Batman.” Diana’s voice.

They both looked at Clark’s hand at the same time, and then back up at each other.

“ _Shit,_ ” Bruce hissed.

“ _Sorry?_ ” Clark tried one of his smiles, but he knew he was doomed now anyway.

Bruce went to sit in his chair once again, Clark quickly pulled up his pants. “Wonder Woman. What did you hear?”

“From _hmm… baby_ up until _just fuck me here already_.“ Great. So Flash was there too.

“Yes. Well, Superman and I are… dating.” No point in denying it now.

“Ha! That didn’t sound like dating to me!”

“Wally! Shut up!”

“It brings me great joy to know you finally found each other.” J’onn. _Finally_   was maybe not the right word.

Bruce sighed. “We’ll address this tomorrow in the meeting. Now go back to your work.” He cut off the call and turned back to Clark.

Clark swallowed. “I’m sorry, Bruce. I—“

“Go upstairs, Clark. I’ll finish up here while I think of your punishment.”

“Aww, Bruce, come on! You know it didn’t happen on purpose!”

“Go.”

 

Almost an hour later, he found Clark in the library, by the fire.

“The couch. You’ll sleep on the couch for a week.”

“And will you sleep with me on the couch?” Clark tried a smile.

“We’ll see about that.”

 

 

 


End file.
